Monday, June 23, 2014

Love vs. Cynicism

The other night I just couldn't sleep, so I spent some time in reflection and prayer in order to properly process some things that folks had come to me about and that I had experienced personally.  I scribed the thoughts and prayers of my heart in my journal (which I find is a very helpful practice).  My writing and praying started to reveal a common theme that seemed to be the core problem. The human tendency to assume the worst about those around us.  As my pen kept going, the things that were burdening my soul just spilled out onto the page almost unconsciously.  Allow me to paraphrase my thoughts in one sentence:  Sin corrupts love by making us naturally cynical of those around us.
            In the world today and even in the Church, there is a tendency for us to assume the worst when it comes to how we perceive those around us.  Although our court legislature has established a policy where a man is innocent until proven guilty, in our daily lives it is more often the opposite.  We expect that people have poor intentions and   we project that expectation at times on the people around us.  For example, when someone says something that offends  us, we tend to assume that they intended to offend us.  Or we believe that individuals have self-seeking agendas behind their actions.  There is a trend to make incriminating conclusions about the character of others with no real evidence other our subjective interpretation or feelings.
            Now I don’t know about you, but I know I wrongly justify that at times because there have been many instances in my experience where such assumptions have been true.  It is not difficult to see as we look at the world around us that there are many examples of people with evil agendas lurking behind their actions.  As a result of that fact, it is easy for us to then take a generalized stance of presuming that people around us have wicked intentions no matter what the relational context (co-workers, church members, friends, family, spouses etc).  That’s where our human logic leads us in response to the sinfulness of our world. But we need to look at what Scripture has to say.
            On that late night I was lead to read and meditate on first Corinthians, chapter thirteen, verses four through seven.

            “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”

            Now, I know for a lot of us, these verses are familiar.  I know we can unfortunately tend to react to their familiarity with apathy and skim over this significant message.  However, one of the listed characteristics popped off the page: Love “believes all things”.  If we took that at face value, many of us would probably misunderstand the text.  I know I did not fully understanding the meaning of it myself.  That's why we can’t just be readers of the word, we need to study it.  We need to treat the Scriptures like a gold-mine, with a willingness to dig in order to extract the precious Truth it contains.
            I started going through some of my commentaries, investigating how Biblical scholars interpreted the meaning of that phrase “believes all things”.  They all came to the same conclusion, although they used different, highly educated wording.  So, I’m going to try and break it down in simpler terms for those of you who are like me and find your head spinning after five syllables.
            There were two facets to the interpretation of this short but significant phrase.  First, it does not mean we should completely abandon any attempt to be discerning when it comes to relationships. However, any conclusion we come to should not be an ignorant assumption based on feelings or subjective interpretation, but should be made by asking questions and gathering objective evidence to support such a conclusion.
            Second, it means that we need to be willing to give those around us the benefit of the doubt.  To be willing to believe the best about someone instead of assuming the worstNeedless to say, this is easier said than done. John Calvin put it very well when he said that this goes against the “common spirit”.  It is difficult because we as human beings, in this philosophical and cultural era, are naturally cynical.  However, if we truly want to love our neighbors (everyone around us) and experience the fullness of joy what Christ calls us to, the application of this ideal is critical. 

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